Brenda Della Casa is the founder of BDC Digital Media, LLC, editor-in-chief of Badass Living, and the author of Cinderella Was a Liar.
Check her out on Facebook, Instagram, and Twitter: @Brenda Della Casa.
People are not willing to take the time to actually get to know each other because if it doesn't happen tonight, then screw it, they're moving onto the next girl. People are a commodity since there's always a new fresh batch moving in with bright-eyed wonder and innocence.
Who would choose a date they've never met before over a work commitment? Why turn off the TV and miss the end of the game when you can have sex and listen to the score in the background? In any other city, the time you take to go on one date would otherwise be filled with an evening home alone re-watching an episode of , but in New York City, you can either go on a date with someone you've never met before and possibly have an okay time, but realistically, just call it a success if the other person isn't completely crazy, OR you could have the best night of your life with your friends and a guaranteed good time dancing and ending up eating chicken and rice at 3 a.m.
Conversation flows, you laugh at each other's lame jokes; it's going well, right?
He tells you he's going to the gym and asks if you want to come lift. You meet a guy on Coffee Meets Bagel (hey, technology is the way to go for dating nowadays! He tells you he works in Asia for the majority of the year. He apologizes for not texting you before, and you guys end up having a great time and end up alone. The investment banker making over a quarter million a year doesn't have enough time to get off his Blackberry and hold a real conversation, but neither does the broke half guitarist/half barista who is always rushing off to go to a gig in Brooklyn.
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), but when it comes to finding more than momentary love, dating here can be a little tricky.
And on the morning of the Sabbath, He came down from his six-story walk-up for bodega coffee, while She met her friends for boozy brunch and tales of her one-night stand with Him, including the part where -- after the awkward morning Exodus -- she admired his floor-to-ceiling windows and wondered how much rent would be if they ended up moving in together, even though they only slept together one time and She didn’t know His last name. If you’re unmarried and under 40 in NYC, you’re doing just fine. These days, when 87% of your first dates are based on swipe-rights, it’s important to pick a spot with an easy escape route, just in case that mysteriously sexy photo with the sunglasses and beanie obscures pockmarks and a receding hairline. I’m sure your personality is great and kudos on all the degrees, but we don’t have time to invest in you only to find out you’re terrible in bed. If your date (that went really well, by the way) is not calling you back, chances are you really didn’t do anything wrong.
Those lessons you learned when hunting for your first NYC apartment can also be applied to dating. Windows in the bedroom means you forego a closet, even though you’re still paying ,000 a month. While all of your friends in Hasting, Minnesota were wifed up at 27 with child number three on the way, you are 32-years-old, still doing Pickleback shots on a Tuesday night, and sleeping with the bartender. Every New Yorker should have a safety first date bar, within two blocks of his or her most direct subway line. And we will break up with you if you’re terrible in bed.
If you’re looking for a long-term partner who is truly compatible with your lifestyle, personality and relationship goals, then Elite Singles is the right New York dating site for you.
Our thoughtful matchmaking process not only streamlines your search, it can connect you with the type of NYC singles you actually to be dating. Even in one of the world's biggest cities, home to literally millions of singles, finding love is still really difficult. Elite Singles can help connect you with New York singles.
The weekends are times for doing things you actually enjoy, with people you actually enjoy. It’s essentially an awkward interview for getting naked. There’s no awkward car ride to take your date home.