But in addition to starting an exciting new job, I moved here with the intention of finding a new man.

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"I feel invisible in San Francisco and attractive whenever I leave." No surprise, then, that in that same Facebook study, San Francisco also ranked dead last in the likelihood of relationship formation, based on the number of Facebook users who changed their status from "single" to "in a relationship" during the period studied last fall. Is it possible that single, straight guys in San Francisco are just not interested in meeting women? We've all heard about Silicon Valley's epic "Peter Pan syndrome," in which thousands of young workers from around the world prolong their independence while carving out careers, heading west to strike (tech) gold.

"The courtship culture is just much less aggressive here," acknowledges Colin Hodge, 28, CEO of Down, an app that lets users connect to date or "get down." He says that many men might find women in the Bay Area harder to approach, partly because there aren't as many of us to go around.

She speaks about mid-life dating dilemmas for various organizations, including The Society of Single Professionals.

She's been a guest on ABC TV's The View From The Bay and assorted radio shows.

She also co-sponsors mingling events and seminars for singles.

' " my friend texted on a recent Tuesday while I was riding BART. For the past week, I realized, I had been too busy living "The Bachelorette." I'd been juggling guys and dates in a refreshing whirlwind of activity that, until recently, had been entirely foreign since I'd re-entered the singles scene almost a year ago. Census data show there are more single men than single women under 65 (though in San Francisco that doesn't necessarily mean single men who want to meet women).And according to a Facebook study of its users conducted last fall, San Francisco rates highest among major American cities on the ratio of single men to single women.Matchmaking service the Dating Ring has even launched a crowdfunded campaign to send New York's single women to meet all of San Francisco's "eligible bachelors." At first, as women do, I internalized the problem ("the glasses are distracting"; "I'm going to the wrong places").It didn't help my ego that in January, Marie Claire pinpointed our fair city as one of the top five "great places for single girls." After attempting almost comical displays of "approachability" that have to be seen to be believed (trust me), I acknowledged the sobering truth: The courtship culture in San Francisco is not normal.Despite loads of single men, getting a date is a no-man's land. "I'd forgotten what it was like to be flirted with," says Kink and Code blogger Emma Mc Gowan, 27, who noticed it during a recent visit to New York.I finally saw and experienced what I was missing out on.